If you’ve spent time on social media or visited a home goods store you’re probably familiar with inspirational quotes like this. Although I generally find them cheesy, this particular line rings true and is something I think we all could remind ourselves of more often.
Keeping up with the Jones is nothing new but it’s become easier than ever to fall prey to the natural urge to compare ourselves to others. Technology puts the best parts of others' lives on display. A quick swipe through your favorite social media feed usually shows plenty of smiling faces announcing engagements, vacations, new cars, big houses, and the like. While this makes for good content, it’s important to remember it’s curated.
Unfortunately, the sex work community often takes things a step further, blurring the lines between fantasy and reality. That is a big part of what we do, after all, and often it extends into our branding and marketing. All this to say, take what you see with a grain of salt. So many suitors see my pictures and think they can't measure up to the lifestyle portrayed when the truth is that my outfits are thrifted, my bag is from Target, and I'd rather eat at a burger joint than a Michelin star restaurant.
While browsing Twitter and Reddit, I often see the question “can I see an escort if I’m not fabulously wealthy/able to lavish them with designer gifts/book extended or extravagant dates?” The answer is a resounding “Yes!” While I am grateful for every suitor, those who save to see me or request appreciation pricing are especially close to my heart. Knowing that you've gone to such trouble to allow us to meet only heightens my anticipation and interest.
Stop comparing yourself to others in terms of physical features, skills, or ability to spoil me. These questions lead to unintentional self-sabotage because until brought up, thoughts of others are the farthest thing from my mind when we’re together. One of the most beautiful parts of companionship is savoring the time we get to share so let’s not waste a minute thinking about anything but each other.
Besides the unwelcome distraction, such thoughts do nothing for self-confidence. You are unique in all the best ways! Tell me your passions, the details you think are too mundane, and the secrets you think aren't worth sharing. Heighten the intimacy of our date by connecting in mind as well as body.
But, while your individuality is what will make our time special, remember that the desire for companionship and intimacy is universal. Although fulfilling these with a provider can carry a social stigma, doing so is actually a convenient, discreet, and responsible decision. Feel proud of your choice to safely satisfy the need for closeness and connection with a companion.
So, take a deep breath, and say it with me: “I am enough.” More than enough, actually, and deserving of all the good things life has to offer. Will you enjoy them with me?